Jan. 22nd, 2017

spankedbyspike: (SbS)
Hope you will enjoy the read and if anything in here inspires you for a longer fic or some art, please do not hesitate!

I was . . . once a child, happy and care free. It was a time filled with playful memories, supported by a loving mother, never once thinking of my father!

I am . . . a slightly introvert friend that truly believes in the hero within me. I am the mirror of my mom, caring about others and yet able to do it all on my own!

I am… a dreamer of impossible adventures and even better, working relentlessly to create my own by becoming a Hunter. What's that you say? Let me tell you about my dad and how lucky I was to have met him when I turned eight...

I think . . . that you will assume that I lie, that Changelings do not exist, that Supernatural creatures are a figment of my imagination and that maybe I am a crazed kid channeling my inner Don Quixote. I know the truth though... and when push comes to shove, I can stand on my two feet and fight back... or flee with grace... After all, the only good hero is the living one, if you'd believe my uncle, Sam Winchester.

I wonder . . . if my dad shares Uncle Sam belief. Maybe it has to do with the fact that their own father is not there with them, day in and day out. A victim at times, a hero at others, almost too often an ass... Not my words, mind you, but as you hear the Winchester siblings talk in hushed tones about John, he must have been one hell of a bear to contend with!

I wish . . . I could have spent time with the man. But if it is anything like the last six months, with Dean, my dad, here at home, then I can assure you that the Winchester family is one you all would like to join. I know my dad miss him but even more he misses his brother and if wishes could really come true, I would have spend so much time on my knees praying for everyone safe return, or if not possible for more time together…

I save . . . news clippings late at night, wherever I can and when I am alone. My parents don’t want me to even entertain the idea of becoming a Hunter; it cost too much they say, I reply that it is too much fun not to.

I always . . . do what I want. At least I used to. Of course once a badass Dean Winchester moves in and becomes the man in charge in your own home, it’s kind of hard standing up for your principles if you can’t damn well justify they are the best freaking choices…

I can't imagine . . . ever going for a joy ride without thinking about his whole special brand of discipline. The only good news though it’s how it’s always followed by pies… Pies galore! Pies up to the tenth! I wonder where all that sugary pie ends up… He really still has a six pack… My dad!

I believe . . . that there is a reason for my world to have been upturned and for Dean deciding to live with us. He has made such a difference in our lives, I can’t even imagine a time and place in which he is not part of our family. We are all better together.

I promise . . . to be true to the man Dean is, to the woman my mom is, to the memory of those lost to the battle fought in the dark to give a chance to humanity to be all that it can be.

I love . . . today, tomorrow and forever. I love myself, the child I was, the teen I am, the fighter I will be and everyone that helps me be the best I can be!

Based on a meme with the original prompt of "I" that you have to complete in the spirit of an SPN Character of your choice at [livejournal.com profile] spn_spankings
spankedbyspike: (SbS)
I was . . . certainly a broken soul as much as a broken man when the Mark of Cain was trusted upon myself.

I am . . . not ashamed of where my priorities lie... with Sammy, with Castiel, with those we saved along the way.

I think . . . that if my father was alive today, his brand of discipline would have helped me, more than alcohol, more than nightly hookups, more than the self-pity I am drowning in. It would have given me an outlet for the rage of not completing a task, saving a life, screwing up a world that really didn't need it to, and giving me the forgiveness no one takes the time to bestow on me nowadays.

I wonder . . . if today will be the day I'll stop caring. The day the revenge that I deserve to get and the exhaustion of seeing how greedy, corrupt and self-serving some people are, will be the one where I will fully embrace Cain, reach into my teaching into the hands of Alastair and start a reign of terror, right here, under everyone's feet.

I wish . . . that I had more time to figure out how to stop Sammy from leaving for Stanford. I wish that my parents never met Azazel. I wish that Ellen and Jo, Bobby and Pastor Jim, Lisa and Ben and so many more could see a universe that thanked them for the kindness they brought to it and yes to me.

I save . . . my thoughts under stupid puns, many beers and sometimes even gluttony; I wouldn't want Sam to know them and to realize how close to the surface they are, and how easily they are underlined by powerful emotions. Something to hide under any circumstance...

I always . . . will put Sam first, he may hate it, despise me for it, vent by telling me enough hurtful things to fill a bucket in Hell and still I will always put his well being first.

I can't imagine . . . a world without him, without his ever-present bulk in the car, the hotel, the bunker...

I believe . . . mistakes were made, hopes were raised and ultimately I was just a part of a not so well-oiled machine. One that impose on our world a Faith like determination, keeping all humans as the peons they are, playing their part, barely making a dent in this cosmos Added to neither the naughty nor the nice llist, but being played at all times by higher powers, lower demons...

I promise . . . to always be true to myself, to the boy that tried so hard to emulate John Winchester, hunter extraordinaire; the man willing to emulate Sam, exceptional researcher and sole family member, and even Castiel, otherworldly empath that adopted us and always showed me a better way.

I love . . . with fear, with worries, with doubt and in silence; too afraid that someone will rip it apart, will destroy my little heart, will trample the things and people I hold dear. In secret, and from afar.

Based on a meme with the original prompt of "I" that you have to complete in the spirit of an SPN Character of your choice at spn_spankings
Page generated Sep. 22nd, 2017 04:14 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios